If you would have even tried to tell me what events would unfold in 2008, I would have shook my head and refused to believe. Not possible for so many soul stirring events to occur in one year! Not possible for so many I know to suffer so much! Not possible for my own path to include twists, turns and doubling back on itself! Not possible to have so much peace in the midst of so much chaos!
There have been moments I thought I would fold from the weight of the pain...my own and that of others...implode from the pressure of decisions and a search for clarity...For me, this has been a year of cracked foundations...a roller coaster ride of lessons that are still being learned in full...growth occurring in places I saw no need for change and enormous fallout resulting from unavoidable conflict. Humbleness...sadness...chaos...confusion...brokeness...loss of control...
Yet...This year has not left me hopeless or defeated. This year has left me no longer suprised by sin...the depth of my own or that of others. This year, and it's events have caused me to cling to the one surety...that God is sovereign and in control. This year has left me with a desire and thirst for knowing God that I may have not experienced any other way. I look forward with hope for the future.
What I am delighted by is the promise that 2009 is to be filled with living in Him...and that for today, for this moment my faith and hope is not in others or myself, but in Christ alone....and for this nanosecond I have submitted my will to His and will keep doing that one nanosecond at a time. One decision at a time...one action at a time...one word at a time... that by relying on Him...I just might be able to keep doing the next right thing...And that in spite of me...He will allow me to...
I have no New Years resolutions...I have set no goals...I am letting go inch by inch...living moment by moment...releasing the facade of control I have over my life...emptying me of me...so that I can be filled up with Him.Trade these ashes in for beauty
And wear forgiveness like a crown
Coming to kiss the feet of mercy
I lay every burden down
At the foot of the cross...
Comments
May we continue to grow in Him as we trust in him alone.
Happy New Year friend.